Bad news like this is always rubbish, but I want to give you all an honest portrayal of our journey.
This morning I lost Camilla.
She was 27 hours old. I found her listless and barely warm. Her mum was frantic to the point she had managed to push out of their mothering up pen. Camilla had no suck reflex and her mouth was cold so I couldn’t give her anything orally to help until I warmed her up. I immediately had her under a heat lamp, wrapped in a blanket, with me as extra heat. She was barely breathing but I prayed. I felt helpless and guilty, and there was nothing more I could do for her. She died 20 mins later right there on my lap. I won’t lie, I shed a tear for a life wasted.
I had a moment, I cried a little, as I’m sure most farmers do when they lose a life like this, (whether you see them do it or not), and then I stood up, I dusted myself off, and tended to the rest of my flock. Camilla’s mum was allowed to see her lamb so she knew what had happened and wouldn’t continue to fret, and then she too moved on to look after Charles.
This is life, this is farming, we care, we feel and we carry on because we love what we do, and it’s the life we have chosen. Camilla isn’t the first lamb I have lost, I would love her to be the last but that’s not reality.
Today wasn’t great but tomorrow will hopefully be better.
